We've all been here, at the point in our lives where people's opinions begin to poke at our core and determine how we go about our next move. That was me, for the last few months. I burst onto the literary scene just two years ago, waving my flag and declaring that I was different... much different from the others. Before I knew anything about charts and bestsellers, I had one goal and that was to defy the stereotypes of black love - or the lie that beautiful black love stories didn't exist. SO, I set forth on my journey, depicting the lives of the people that I saw everyday... notably urban-natured characters.
Listen, you can lie to yourselves, but I won't let you lie to me. It's hotter than a camel's cooch out here. Now, I'm not exactly sure how hot that is, but use your imagination. Yesterday, it was 101 degrees. Imagine that. Moving along. For the past year (since relocating to Dallas, TX), I've been feeling as if I'm going through menopause.
Wow. That's pretty much what I thought to myself as thorns prickled my eyelids in the form of salty tears waiting to slide down my cheeks, but they didn't. They stayed and they continued to burn -much like the desire I held inside pertaining to my career as a creator. You haven't taken a big enough risk.
Dear Black Man, I Love You
For now, I want to remind my black man just how much he is loved and appreciated. In a world where they're being murdered and pursued as the big bad wolves, we must continue to pour good faith into our black men. No one is gong to do it for us. Women, be the Queen. When a simple encounter with the police can be the moment he takes his last of breaths, and be sent to the glory, we must lift him up while he's still on borrowed time. If you have a black man, know a black man, or will soon encounter one, here's to him.
Dear Black Man,
I love you. I love you like the bees love honey, and the banks love money. I know that line was corny, but I had to start with something funny. After all that's happening, now, I wanted to give you a reason to smile before I commanded your time for a little while.
On a more serious note, I love you for your rich chocolate stature, and line of unfiltered heritage. Even if you're worthless to others, you mean the world to me. Whether it's the wrinkles within your aging skin or the dimming of your dark eyes, they tell a complete story of strife, lack of acceptance, cruelty, pain, injustice, anger, and worry... For you don't know what your tomorrow holds. Yet, and still, you're beautiful, black man.
Black man, you owe no apology for your broad features and manly curves. Your shell is so true to your culture, and it's awe-striking. You're built like a precious fixture in my grandmother's living room... You're made so wonderfully. My God, he was showing out when he created you. I brag... I'll admit that I brag about you all of the time. Your dark hair, eyes, large lips, round nose, and facial hairs. Everything is placed so perfectly. I just love you, black man.
Black man, your strength is commendable. Each time you're knocked down, you get back up. You remind me of one of those Tom and Jerry episodes, determination being your strong suit. Those millions of times when I couldn't give 100% of what God had given, you simply poured more of your goodness into my cup. That's why I love black man. Even with calloused hands, strong facial features, and arms claimed by muscle... You're the gentle giant that no one wants to learn to understand, but I do, black man.
Black man, I'm gushing over you. Don't you see that? While everyone is gunning you down, I'm appalled at your will to place your armor on and go to war each day. I'm not just meaning physically. I'm talking mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It's amazing how you fight those mental battles while smiling and carrying on about your day. You never let your emotions get the best of you while you're heading the dinner table and bowing to pray... God, it must be so difficult to keep your faith... When your brothers are being killed everyday... But black man, if you walked out of our house just after kissing the children, and was gunned down today, know that we love you... And your worries as a black man have been taken away.
Black man, I'm raising your son. The harsh realities of his future keeps me up at night. Black man, how do I overcome the fact that my baby boy will be slighted simply by the color of his skin. You have the answers that I so desperately seek. Next time, can we talk about this before you lay down to sleep? Because, as his parent, I want the world to love him just as I do, much like your mother loved you. Black man, forgive me for flipping the strip, but the concern arose as I thought of all that's unsure. I'll rest my case until you're home from work. I'm not you, black man. I can never be. So, please enlighten me on the well-being of our seed.
I had a moment of uncertainty...
Back to you...
Black man, you're the definition of excellence. Everything about you is worth a hoot and a holler. The bells and the whistles. The fun and the fancy. From your head to your toe, you should be clothed in the finest garments, bathed with pure glitter and silk, acknowledge when your presence is upon others, celebrated in a major way, gather the harps to sing, and rightfully be crowned King.
It's my duty as your Queen, to open up... And remind you that you are beautiful. You are bold. Your are strong. You are important. You are black... You are a black man... You are a BELOVED black man.
Your Black Queen.
To all of our fallen soldiers, may your souls rest in peace. We haven't forgotten about you, and we never will.
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On this rainy morning, I galloped from my bed to sit at my computer and start this beautiful blog that tells of a little girl from Memphis, TN that became someone she never dreamt of being with the key component to her success contributed to becoming her own best cheerleader. That little girl has grown to be world renowned, penning the most intriguing stories one will ever lay eyes on. She's been in the hands and on the minds of people that she'll probably NEVER meet a day in her life, but they trust her wholeheartedly to continue to dip into their greatest fantasies as if she's snatched the thoughts from their minds personally. With over 35 titles under her belt, this amazing little girl has been deemed one of the best in the industry -named amongst the greatest. That same little girl packed her bags and moved to Dallas, TX without having a blood relative for at least 420 miles away from her humble adobe in the heart of the city. The little bitty girl fought through the devastating loss of her daughter's father, using her imagination to pen stories just to cope on even her greatest days. Depression and self-neglect had turned that little girl into a mere shell of who she once was, a vibrant soul.
Kyshira S. Moffett MBA, is the founder and Chief Bombshell Officer of The KSM Group. She is a global brand strategist with expertise in digital engagement. She is also the founder of Life of a Bombshell Cosmetics and author of Bombshell of All Trades. Kyshira is also the creator of #HERmovement, a lifestyle brand that has skyrocketed into a full-fledged movement. The blog centers on business, branding and lifestyle topics. #HERmovement represents today's busy bombshell, the ambitious millennial in pursuit of excellence while feeling the fear and doing it anyway. Since its inception in 2013, #HERmovement has grown to reach thousands of readers globally! Branches of #HERmovement include a growing Facebook group, The Bombshell Diaries Podcast, YouTube Channel and a monthly Twitter chat that was featured in Ebony Magazine.
Let's just say that this blog has been burning my soul for over two weeks. I've been trying to decide on a less aggressive title than my former one, "10 Most OBVIOUS Mistakes Authors Are Making." I didn't want to come off as rude, or even as a know it all. Because, facing the facts, I don't know it all. However, I'm aware of common mistakes that are costing authors precious coins, at their own hands and at the hands of others.
"I want to make the charts."
"I'm trying to get to number one."
"Make me a bestseller!"
I hear it time and time again. It's refreshing to see so many authors setting goals to have their literary pieces liked and read by the masses. The feeling of driving your release home by landing a spot on the bestseller's chart is riveting, enchanting. I've succumbed to the divine feeling with each release that I have launched into the public with pretty amazing responses. For this small fact, I am hopeful for current and aspiring authors because I know that it can be done. You're not aimless.
We all know that running a business can be both draining and time stressful to say the least. We're always so worried about making sure that our business needs are met that we often times forget about our personal needs. Self-care is usually neglected when your business's progress or lack there of is constantly at the forefront of your daily. However, I must tell you that you must first take good care of SELF before you can anything else. We so easily burn ourselves out and end up helpless all together. I've seen it a thousand times.
Honestly, I loss a bit of my sanity each time I thought of scenes or very unique key points in my stories, but they were all gone by the time life kicked my ass and I was back at my computer. One day, I decided that I wasn’t going to lose another bit of importance in my stories. On that day, I started outlining. It changed my life forever! Seriously! So, to answer those tons of questions about outlining, here!
Fear will keep you grounded, rooted, trembling at the thought of propelling into the greatness that you deserve. That energy-sucker runs rapid through your brain, causing it to demand bullshit assignments from your body, mind, and soul in their entirety. What's even worse is that it's addictive. Fear is ADDICTIVE. When living in fear, you are prepared for whatever, because your expectancy rate is at an all time low.
In these entrepreneur streets, it's hard to see yourself missing a dime, honestly. You want to be able to accommodate at will, gain new customers consistently, be present on social media, care for your current clients while picking up more, develop healthy relationships with other creators, keep new products in the works, get out products sitting on your iMac, deliver meaningful content, and just be all that in a bag of chips.
Well, I'm here to tell you how being all that and a bag of chips landed me on my ass, for real. Burnt out. Toasted. Fried, dyed, and laid to the side.